Monday, May 21, 2012

I Miss India

“I miss India so much”, my wife broke her own record of playing this broken record.

“Why do you miss India so much”, curious daughter asked.

“I don’t know.”

“Maybe she does not miss India”, I could not resist.

“Why do you say that dad?”

“What will you miss when you are old?” I asked my daughter.

“Oh, I don’t want to be old,” her reply was swift.

“Why? You can drive when you are older.”

“I have two chauffeurs. Why should I look at traffic?”

“You will make a lot of money and spend whatever way you want.”

“But I don’t want to worry about bills, insurance and mortgage,” she replied.

“Think about it. No school, no home work and activities of your own choice.”

“Well I prefer school to office, fun activities to grocery shopping, school home work to cleaning the house. I love being a child.”

“I have one definite advantage of being adult”, I tried last time.

“Dad, I get the point. Mom misses her childhood in India and the not the country India,” she continued, “Can I ask a question now?”

“Sure.”

“When I am grown up, will you still lecture me?”


PS:- My daughter is right. Most Non Resident Indians miss their childhood and not necessarily the country India. What do you think?

46 comments:

Anjuli said...

ha ha- I love your daughter!! Everytime you post something she comments on or talks about- I see so much wisdom!!!

Although I'm not a non resident Indian- I was just discussing with my hubby how I miss "Singapore/Malaysia" and at the end of the discussion we realized it was the 'childhood' memories I have that I miss!!

Great post- as always!

NRIGirl said...

Greetings A! Hearty welcome to the blog world. It wasn't quite the same without having you around... Bikram would vouch for that!

About India, I believe it is a bit more than the childhood; it is the people we miss.

Now, when a wife misses India it is because she is so overwhelmed with her house keeping duties and just want to relax in her mother's house.

Your daughter is smart! She doesn't want to grow up! Wishing her fun summer!

Amrit said...

Thanks Anjuli. My wife definitely misses her primary, secondary school and college days. When she talks about India, that is all she talks. :))

Amrit said...

Yes. It is the people associated with us when we were little. Our school friends, college friends and of course family :)) Well when my wife goes to India she only shops and does not relax :))

My daughter is so ready for summer break.

About blog world, I noticed several people have let. I guess they are busy or found some other interest.

Renu said...

We all have such sweet memories of childhood, so we miss it..I am not a NRI so I cant understand the feeling, but whenevr i go to US for 2 months, I start missing my home, my daily schedule..

Sandhya said...

Very interesting conversation. You daughter is fun to be with, I am sure.

Yes, your wife must be missing her childhood in India. Most of us miss our innocent childhood.

Including you and now me...have nearly stopped writing blogs now. I don't see anything new to read when I am bored!

Smita said...

It is the memories and people that we miss not a place. In fact sometimes when you visit a place after a long time and with loads of anticipation it turns out to be an anti climax because u realise a place is made by people :)

And ur daughter is super smart and such a big haazir jawaab :)

Punam said...

Not only just the childhood, what is missed is the lively atmosphere, joint families, grand parents, sharing and caring, the loud markets, the familiarity.. and I believe what you encounter as an NRI is the deafening silence.. I might be wrong though..

....Petty Witter said...

Ah the wisdom of childhood. Great post, I suspect you may be right in suggesting your wife misses her childhood in India as opposed to the country itself and wonder if she would be so happy living there as an adult given that much must have changed.

Bikramjit said...

Nope not right , I miss my childhood and my youth too.. and since all my friends are in india and i have not made very many here .. I miss the country on the whole too..

plus my mother is in that country so even more reason to miss the country .. my reasons are first and formost I am with my people .. if you know what i mean , the air I am breathing is of my country and my fields and all

Bikram's

rads said...

She's so right..I do miss the times I spent with friends n family in India rather than India itself. India is lovable coz all my loved ones are there.

sm said...

nice thoughtful conversation

Vaish said...

I missed my childhood days even while I was in India. The traffic-free roads, the road grocery shops, dad coming home at 6.00, less crowded buses, not so much of pollusion..everything. These days kids don't get that kind of fun. But yeah..I do miss my childhood days and India when I'm living outside..
Liked your daughter's punch dialogues "I prefer school to office......"

Amrit said...

Renu, if you live in the USA you will have a home and a daily schedule. I feel out of home when I travel regardless wherever I go. :)) I am a home birdie too. But missing childhood is kind of different.

Amrit said...

Sandhya, I was very busy so could not write but I plan to write weekly. That was my frequency before too. :)) But I don't want to make a rule then it becomes burden.

Yes, most of us miss childhood :))

Amrit said...

Completely agree about people. :)) She always has quick answers :))

Amrit said...

Punam, may be 40 years back that was the situation. Also it depends where one lives. It is like mini India here. We know a lot of people with families here and joint families too. Also parents keep visiting from India - almost for 6 months in a year. Believe me it is not at all silent here. Actually it is noisy...parties, music, loud talking..

Most of my college and some school friends live here in the USA so I don't who I should meet when I go to India. That is part of the reason I don't go. When I meet these friends we behave like children.

My wife's friends are all in India though but her mother visits us.

Amrit said...

Yes. You are right India has completely changed. But we like some aspects of the changes. :)) Thanks for the complement.

Amrit said...

Bikram, if your childhood friends and your mom were in the UK, would still miss India? Probably not.

Amrit said...

Rads, yes. Mostly we miss the people and family. :))

Amrit said...

Thanks

Amrit said...

Bingo. You are right. We want to time to go back. We do need a time machine to take us back. I wish there was one.....

Rahul Bhatia said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Rahul Bhatia said...

Nice post, Amrit! Childhood memories always stay with us :)

jyothismusings said...

ha ha....Lectures... Will you stop giving lectures?

Here, the kids have devised a new way instead of answering back. They let their thoughts wander into more pleasant things. I know because they always have a smile on their faces even if I am lecturing them about crucial truths about this world!!!

Sigh! It doesn't feel good being ignored. The only happy thing is, they will realize it all one day when its their turn to lecture! And I smile too. :)

People and memories are missed. And to a certain extent places too. I still remember the ice cream place we used to frequent while in college. And the hostel and its surroundings. Yes, I spent only my college years in India and those were the best years of my life! :)

Whirlwind said...

Agree! Memories of childhood are hard to forget. Its a path one chooses to take when the adulthood mania gets to you.

Shobha said...

So very true.. each one of us has fond memories of childhood.I feel so nostalgic when I hear the ghazal- "WO KAGAZ KI KASHTI WO BAARISH KA PANI"
My son often says, "mom, you did all those crazy things, playing in the rain etc. etc. but you were over protective about us and never let us do all that".
He is right... but moms are always like that..

ಅಶ್ವಿನಿ/ Ashwini said...

A year while I spent in the states all that I missed was the fun with family and friends back in India. I missed all those late night gossips of really nothing of much importance, walking up the roads, playing with all the kids of our age. Yes I sometimes got into a mode of nostalgia and there were times I simply picked the phone to call some cousin or friend of mine just to share my feeling. Great post Amrit. I love your daughters wise words.

Insignia said...

India or elsewhere people miss the package - the environment, friends, relatives....I have met NRIs you have shown extreme interests w.r.t India

anupama said...

Dear A,
Happy to note your daughter has her independent views.
It's not just the childhood..it's the culture..the traditions..the rituals..the religion...!One's own people...!
The beautiful greens.....! the wonderful festivals....!the fun..the frolic..!
Mera Bharat Bahan !
Parents should keep lecturing and advising....! :)
Sasneham,
Anu

Bikramjit said...

Well if my friends and mom were in uk I would not know of india that much .. would I.

Destination Infinity said...

Oh my, I was not half as clear (in my thoughts) when I was younger. Perhaps even now :)

I do agree with your point of view that all of us miss our childhood. Those dreamy days. Still, there were good times and bad times combined, even back then. Otherwise, why do we cry when we are children?

Today is reality. Also, today has its own charm. Only if we choose to look at it. I think.

Destination Infinity

Tanishka said...

Missing childhood has got nothing to do with being an NRI... Those who have had a happy childhood will always miss it no matter what...

Amrit said...

Thanks. Childhood memories are with us.)

Amrit said...

That is right Bikram. It is about people and not about the country :))

Amrit said...

My daughter lectures me all the time now...she does not have to wait to grow up for that. :)))

Yes, people are missed. India has changed so much and when I go I find something new every time. Of course it is not the India that I left or my left.:))

Amrit said...

You are so right.

Amrit said...

I like that song so much :))

Yes, children don't see their parents as children :))

Amrit said...

Thanks for sharing your experience:))) Thanks for the calling it 'great post'

Amrit said...

Insignia, what I noticed is NRI talk a lot about India but just for talking. I hear good and bad aspects all the time. When you live you make friends here too. Also these days most of us have relatives in the USA.

Amrit said...

Anupama, where I live it is like India. Actually I learnt about Indian culture and values in the USA (not in India). Indian community here is very much into religion and culture. :)) We celebrate all festivals like Holi, Diwali, Dusera...:))

Amrit said...

Yes, today is reality. But when people grow old, they tend to miss the younger age :))

Amrit said...

Yes, those who had a happy childhood will always miss it. But some NRI think they miss India but in reality they miss their happy childhood :)) That is the point.

Kiran Bajaj Sawhney said...

Your daughter is very smart.
But maybe your wife does miss India. Yes her childhood there too. But maybe India too.

Tanvi said...

Anyone who had a good childhood, will miss it regardless of where they live.

Your daughter is smart ... but your wife could very much the things about India which one probably didn't like when they lived there.

∞ © tanvii.com ∞

Anonymous said...

Smart girl! :) But I think it's possible to miss India as a whole, not just your childhood. From the humid tropical skies to the liberation of speaking in your native language to anyone you see to the millions of things that are imbibed in culture that we try so hard to reproduce here.