Sunday, December 12, 2010

A Woman Shall Never Say To Her Husband…

To stay happy in your married life, a wife shall never say to her husband:

1. “You don’t love me anymore.”
This statement implies that you don’t trust him. Marriage is based on trust and understanding. Trust does not require romance and display of love. If you trust him, he does not need to make mundane statements of love all the time.

2. “Why is this TV program so important for you?”
Do not bother him when he is watching his favorite TV show. Only an earthquake or power failure can distract him. Raising voice is futile. Your vocal chords cannot keep up with the sound levels of the latest speakers. Watching TV is like meditation that helps him to concentrate better.

3. “That guy is very intelligent.”
Your husband is the most intelligent and knowledgeable man in the world. All others are just luckier. He has in depth knowledge of pretty much all subjects.

4. “You cannot multitask.”
No one likes false statements. He can multitask. Talking on cell phone while driving; is a good example of his multitasking skills. Because he is systematic and methodological, he just gives the impression of handling multiple tasks sequentially.

5. “You don’t have good dress sense.”
If he wants, he can be a style icon but he believes in ‘Simple Living High Thinking.’ Simplicity is important to him. Improving mental faculties rather than exterior looks is his motto.

6. “My friend’s husband always gives her surprise gifts.
Always a surprise gift diminishes the purpose. Your husband does not want to lessen the pleasure by frequently presenting you a surprise gift. Though he is always looking for a good opportunity to give you a surprise gift, he has not found many. But you are always in his thoughts and that matters more than materialistic possessions.

7. “When are you going to install the cuckoo clock we bought two years back?
Being a perfectionist, he is waiting for perfect time, perfect day, perfect weather and perfect mood for household projects. Also this is his method to convey to the family a basic principle ‘Patience is Virtue.’ So be patient.

Dear Readers,

Do you want to add some more or change the description of anyone? 


(Author's Note:- I dedicate this post also to all women who juggle priorities of office, home, children and family and yet manage to stay fit, decorate houses, keep up to date with fashion and enjoy precious moments of the life.)

38 comments:

NRIGirl said...

Good one @A! Had to laugh out at the last one...

chitra said...

Good one A, I was laughing. the last one the best. About watching TV, 100% true. So I leave my hubby to watch that and spend my time at computer:). Thanks for dedicating the post to all women , I Quote your last sentence.....

Neeha said...

Rare post 'A',I have read posts about 'What men shouldn't say to women' but never came across a similar post.Hilarious one:)

Kiran Bajaj Sawhney said...

You will be surprised but Guruji has also said about your point 1 and 3. It is there on my blog somewhere in one of His videos. I do not know where. But you have put it up so aptly.

Ria said...

Lol!! Loved these, good tips to remember for my future.

raji said...

good one:)I couldnt stop laughing..This is like a perfect picture of every house.I agree with every statement ..this is my agenda too:)

Grayquill said...

Hah...You ask me to add? What are you crazy? It is impossible to stay happily married and tell a woman she is wrong or made a mistake. I am not going there even for a second.
Thanks for the laugh.

Babli said...

Very good and useful tips. Perfectly right for all couple.

Bikramjit said...

:)

rama said...

My husband never told me in the beginning itself that he ever loved me, so I don't have a reason to complain to him that he doesn't love me anymore.
I leave him to watch his boring TV programmes and feel free to do my own thing.
I am can multi task much better and faster than him and keep telling him to learn from me.
He is very brainy, but when I see some one more brainy than him, I don't hesitate I point it out to him and he agrees, with out feeling bad.
His dress sense starts and ends with whites, blues and lately purples, I leave him ogling at cotton/ linen shirts in these colors, and wait patiently for him to finish his selections.
Well for my birthday, there is never any surprise gifts from him, but this time he asked me what would i like.
For which I told him to get me some nice flowers, and he said it is better I come and choose the flowers for later I would complain that it was not the right flowers, so I had to accompany him to the flower shop to buy my own no- surprise present.
Yes pending jobs are always pending, till one day when I am not in the mood, he would come and ask me where it has to be put.
Well that is life. I think we should let each person be the way they are and give then the space they need, which of course is the secret of any good relationship.

Tanishka... said...

Lol for multitasking one... Men are fond of talking on the phone while driving... :)
And yes what a way of teaching the virtue of patience... :D

Insignia said...

Oh my! These points will good hold globally and forever :)

Blogger Girl said...

Hilarious and at the same time very true... And since you asked for additions I couldn't hold myself. Here is my personal favourite that I have learned not to say to men with my experience:

- "Can you just not look up the address in GPS?" - Women should never say this especially when going to a party - no! this is against the rules, Christopher Columbus didn't follow the directions and neither do today's men!? Circling the block round and round is much more fun than just following boring directions and reach your destination in time!

- Mannat :=)

Punam said...

Hmm Good one. :)

Harman said...

Another..one ..Me:why dont we visit Gurudwara today?
him:is there any special occasion today?
me:no...
him:God is always in my heart and soul..God is right here in our house no need to do all that!!
:)
another one..
Me: lets go out for dinner today?
Him:your the best cook in the world,nobody can beat you in Indian cooking...these guys don't know to make Indian dishes here in US :)
Make something nice today as your at home..I will get the stuff you want for cooking!!

Me:why are you having a drink today ..its not weekend?
him:wine is very good for heart and soul..and even hard drink if taken in moderate quantity everyday helps to build immune system recent research says that....keeps a person goin..so I wannna be nice n healthy too..

Gymming..
expecting some guests at home..honey dont go for gym..
I will come in half an hour...after some time..I called back ..they here..come fast..
Him:I am on my last rep of shoulders..jus one more set left ...take it easy and make them comfortable..
..Guys are very hard to handle.. they show theirs signs of stubbornness sometimes..which I think a women always bears as per the condition and requirement unlike men!
:)

tanvii.com said...

These were entertaining but you know just like the previous post, I do not relate to these either [and neither does my husband] I guess God made us an broke the mold 'coz we never have 'these' issues. I think we are a crazy lot.

Me - You don't love me anymore.
Him - With a grin, "Yeah that's true!"
Both of us - Burst out laughing

He watched what he likes. I watch what I like and we watch together what we both like. Never any discussion.

Husband is a scientist so he is pretty intelligent so not an issue either.

We never make personal remarks [as to you cannot do this or that] and never compare each other to anyone else. We are awesome and that's the end of our story! :)

I prefer Cash and no gifts so again not a problem at all! :)

Lastly, our tasks are divided in the house and we do them as and when we get time. He does his mostly on Sunday.

I am aware how good two shoes we might sound but really I think generalization is not valid any more, for anyone. Husband or Wife! :)

Bedazzled said...

ha ha ha!another hilarious post that strikes a chord.I hope my husband doesnt get to read this post..that'll only give him more ammunition to add to his existing list of explanations

Renu said...

Nice one and all of them are true atleast for me..husbands cant take evn constructive criticism,its better to manipulate them thru praise:)

....Petty Witter said...

You don't have good dress sense - something I used to say to Hd on a daily basis - now I just pick his clothes for him. Not really but the temptation to do so is sometimes soooo great I find myself fighting the urge.

Personally I think any quesetion beginning with the word 'when' should be avoided.

Stranger said...

lol...

Okay here we go...

Oh no...I will email the comments...

sm said...

enjoyed it reading

Usha said...

Fun Read , Men don't like woman using natural strong instinct in predicting his next action,move or dialogue. He finds it very irritative..Women should do it but with lot of caution.

Never guide or instruct men while driving. They just can not take it.

Nice reading your "husband/wife should never say" two part series.

Anonymous said...

"You don’t love me anymore.”

I used to say that before. It is just insecurity and it does not mean I dont trust him. I trust him a lot.

I dont believe in the above sentence or the word love ...

2. “Why is this TV program so important for you?”

I never ask that. only I get upset when he sits in front of TV hours at a stretch while I struggle with teaching two kids... Then I wonder why is everything easy for guys..lol..

3. “That guy is very intelligent.”

I say that if the guy is intelligent. I think he doesn't have any problem with it. Only that he and my brother don't like when their friends start liking me more...lol..

4. “You cannot multitask.”

No guys can...so why bother saying it

5. “You don’t have good dress sense.”

100% true...

6. “My friend’s husband always gives her surprise gifts.”

I never get gifts but if I ask for anything I always get it...

7. “When are you going to install the cuckoo clock we bought two years back?”

Fantastic...we left one clock for one year and finally my daughter asked him whether the clock will give birth to a baby if kept like that.

Usha said...

A , It has been one year since you started blogging...Congratulations!! Remember your first posted love story and would love to read next part of Sikh boy story. :)

A said...

@NRI Girl,

Thanks. Does Cuckoo clock seems like a real story? Haha

@Chitra

Thanks. Fortunately I don’t like to watch TV. So my wife cannot complain about that one. But according to her Internet is same like watching television.

@Neeha,

Thanks. Tried to make it little bit funny 

@Kiran,

Yes. I can believe on point 1 and 3, Guruji providing some insight. However I am just a simple person. Comparison with Guruji won’t be fair. Thanks.

@Ria,

Please don’t take these points too seriously. Each and every individual is different. Newer generation has a different perspective too. Laugh at these points and keep an open mind.

@Gary,

I guess your comment is for my previous post. Thanks for your comment. Seems like you enjoyed the post.

@Babli,

Thanks. Everyone is different so I am not sure if these points are applicable to everyone.

@Bikramjit,

For the first time, you don’t have anything to say. That is strange. Why? Come on, say something. Defend yourself.

@Rama,

Thanks for sharing your personal details. Seriously, I think we can all learn from your practical tips here.

@Tanishka,

We live with cell phone now.  Thanks for your comment.

@Insignia,

Thank you. Don’t frame it though.

@Blogger Girl,

Thanks. I like Columbus one. Perfect reasoning. Is not it?. I personally don’t like GPS system. Either the address is not there or directions are wrong – typical man.

@Punam,

Thanks. I am sure you like this one. It is completely different from previous post. Right?

@Harman,

Thanks for posting these specifics. My wife now realizes that I am the best husband in the world. She agreed after reading yours and some other people’s comment. I am sending you a check now.

@Tanvi,

Yes. Everyone is different and also people change over a period of time. I agree with you.

@Bedazzeled,

It does not matter if your husband reads or not. He already has more ammunition than you know of. Thanks for compliment though.

@Renu,

My wife says that I modeled this post on myself. No criticism is constructive. Manipulation is the way to go.

@PW,

I like it ‘Sentence beginning with When….’ Haha 
@Stranger,

I got your email. Thanks. Very nice one 

@SM,

Thanks

@Usha,

Thanks. Driving is another one – of course. How can I forget it? To your point, maybe men don’t like any women (not just wife and exclude daughter) with instincts of predicting next action.

@Anonymous,

Oh my god. That is clinical analysis. Thanks for detailed comments. I do think ‘love’ exists.

@Usha,

Yes. I just completed one year. I will write a post on it. Sikh Boy story is pending for a reason. But I will work on it. Thanks for reminding. Thanks for reminding me about one year. I appreciate you for being my FIRST reader and always encouraging me to write. Really I mean it. More on this in blog post of one year mark.

dr.antony said...

My feeling is that men are not as sensitive in this matter as women.
But don't talk to other men over the phone in their presence,jealousy is a common trait.

R. Ramesh said...

You don’t have good dress sense.” is the regular charge...well i have to concede..

Sh@s said...

Ha ha...good one. A man doesn't need to utter "I Love you" all the time. He can make good use of technology. Just take a print out of the lovely words and paste it in noticeable places and keep her happy :P

Deepika Vasudeva said...

ahem.. ahem.. well, thats a huge dose of 'gyaan'(knowledge) for me!

Jyothi said...

"You don't love me anymore" is a weapon I use to get things done around here. And it works like magic! And I don't trust him one bit. But thats ok. Trust and understanding ruins the spontaneity. :D Keep the mundane statements coming in please. No one should be taken for granted! Love them and show them.

Deepika Vasudeva said...

i took it in funny way only... don't worry.

AS said...

hiii!
heheh! that was quite close to reality :P

A said...

@Dr.Antony,

Thanks for your comments. I think both are similar but cannot be sure.

@Ramesh,

That is the only one. You are a good husband then.

@Sh,

Technology would not help here either. Haha.

@Deepika,

I assume you are not taking it very seriously. You are a young person. Please keep an open mind and read these blogs as fun only. Even if someone writes seriously, yet it is personal opinion.

@Jyothi,

Weapon. Wow and that works. I agree keep the "mundane" statements coming.

@AS,

Thanks for vote of confidence :)))

Punam said...

A: Yes, :) Right. I like this one more than that. :) I feel offended by wife-bashing u see. ( he he in a light vein.. )

A said...

@Punam,

Two sides of a coin...applies almost to every discussion.

blommer22 said...

nice post, good lesson for the single. :)

Anonymous said...

Link exchange is nothing else except it is just placing the other person's weblog link on your page at appropriate place and other person will also do similar for you.

My page ... herbal party pills

Anonymous said...

Wow, this article is fastidious, my younger sister is analyzing these things, therefore I am going
to let know her.

Here is my web site: kliknij